I will try to catch my "journaling" up to what has been going on in our lives and I'll start by a basic recap of activities I've been up to.
Sometime in 2013 I decided I wanted to pursue a nursing degree.
Occasionally I get woken up by powerful thoughts that seem to come from somewhere other than myself (who knows, possibly inspiration?). One morning in 2013 I woke up to the thought that I need to figure out how to become a nurse. It seemed really out of nowhere, but I decided to look up what it would take and realized that I can go back to BYU and take some classes - the University of Utah offered an accelerated degree for people with a bachelors degree, so I would just need to make sure I took the 10 prerequisites required. They were various basic and mid level biology, chemistry, nutrition, and anatomy classes.
Being a mom and at home as much as possible was still my priority and has stayed that way for all these years. Kevin and I were living in an apartment in Provo at the time but I somehow found someone willing to watch Elena for a few hours each week, so I could attend 2 classes at BYU. Then in 2014 we moved to Saratoga Springs into Kevin's brother John's basement. I kept going to school doing 2 classes at a time, while my sister-in- law Rachel watched Elena for a few hours each week, so I could keep attending my lectures. I became pregnant with Charlie not long after I started school in 2013 and BYU only gave me 1 year to get my classes done (long story on how their post-graduate studies work), so I was rushing to get through most of these 10 classes before Charlie was born. I ended up completing 7 of the 10 and then did 2 more online through BYU independent studies while Charlie was very young and left one final class that I could take online for when it got closer to applying for the nursing program.
The University of Utah strongly encouraged medical experience, so I took a CNA course and started working night shifts at Osmond Senior Living in Lindon. It was a brand new Assisted Living and Memory Care facility and my first exposure to working with the elderly. I had found my niche! I had never realized how much I enjoyed hearing people's life stories and helping feel comfortable in whatever way they needed. I was not bothered by some of the "gross" aspects I had assumed were part of the job - it felt so natural to help someone shower or toilet them etc. Perhaps becoming a mother had changed my perspective on how good it feels to see someone else enjoy human contact and help. Before long I started working as a med tech as well - the person that gives the residents' medications and talks to the nurse about any potential medical needs you're seeing.
We still lived in Saratoga Springs so it was a 30 minute commute to work 3 nights a week. I was working 8 hour shifts from 10pm to 6am, I'd come home and sleep for 2 hours and get to bed early that following night. Being chronically sleep deprived from having little ones had already prepared me for this routine. I didn't mind it.
With my helping to provide a little bit of additional income, Kevin and I were able to buy our first home. It was in Pleasant Grove - much closer to Lindon, where we both worked.
I got pregnant with George (unplanned but totally wanted) towards the end of 2015 and had him in July 2016. He was in fact named after one of my favorite residents at Osmond Senior Living - an 90 something elderly gentleman who loved the Savior more than anyone else I had met. He used to have me sing for him when I'd tuck him in at night- a privilege I kept only for my kids ears due to low confidence in my vocal abilities, caused by being surrounded by much better voices in every ward I ever attended in Utah. He'd sing with me. His favorite hymn was "How Great Thou Art" and every time he sang the verse about how he would stand at the Savior's feet and worship Him we'd both cry. He knew his Savior and was ready to meet Him. I couldn't imagine a better fate for my little boy growing inside my belly at the time. So George he is!
I took a break for a few month after I had George, then came back to working as a med tech at Osmond Senior Living until my closest co-worker moved to Spring Gardens Assisted living, just up the street from there. I moved to working there in huge part because of her. It did help that they had 12 hour shifts so that I was finally able to work full-time in the 3 shifts I was used to working. While working there I applied to the U of U's accelerated nursing program but I wasn't accepted.
In 2018 I got a job at the American Fork hospital in hopes to expand my medical experience and have a better chance of getting into that program. I worked there for 2 years - up until I ended up switching career paths because I was given the opportunity to work from home with a pretty ok pay. That might have been the hardest decision I ever made because it meant giving up on my goal of becoming a nurse, and doing something completely out of my comfort zone. Doing a job from home, so I could be with my kids a lot more as they're getting older was a huge blessing in my eyes.
I have now worked at this other job for 2 years this coming July. When I started, I used to question my decision fairly often because now I sat at a desk in front of a computer, and I was missing the human interaction and fulfilment from working with patients. It seemed odd to many that I made this choice, but I don't regret it, I can't. I work in a team that relies on me and I have learned so much about myself over the past 2 years. I am doing work I never thought I had the mental capacity to do and find odd fulfillment in being able to perform it well. I am also at home with my kids, I no longer leave the house to work, and I no longer stay up all night multiple nights a week. Kevin and I were able to move to a home we love and plan to live in for a long time. I am still trying to piece together whether the thought that woke me up that one morning that I should be a nurse will lead me to fulfilling it some day when the kids are older, or whether it was meant to lead me to a path of discovery of my capabilities and interests that does not necessarily mean I need to be a nurse. I don't know the answer today but hope to find it as I keep walking this road of being a working mom.
Stay tuned!
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